Please look after mom

I think that each parent's nightmare is that his kid was lost. The other way around is available too: one of your parents can be missing. I do not know if there is a smaller or a bigger pain, but I do hope that I will never live to learn it on my own.

This is the center point of the book: one day, as she was heading to her son's house, Park So-nyo got lost. Her family is trying to find her and during their quest, they start remembering old memories with their Mom. Doing so, they discover just how little they had known about her, her dreams, her inner world. 

Park So-nyo's name appears rarely throughout the book. The author uses mainly Mom to bring attention to her, to what she had been doing for her family and for the others. Maybe this is how the South-Korean writer Kyung-Sook Shin thought to bring her readers' attention towards the main character, her sacrifices and her struggles. Because, what is Park So-nyo if not the portrait of every single mother who puts her dreams on a second place in order to be able to raise her kids and help them achieve theirs?

The book has five chapters and each one is written using another voice:

- Chapter 1 -  Nobody knows - is written by the oldest daughter, the 30+ writer, never married.

“...I have so many dreams of my own, and I remember things from my childhood, from when I was a girl and a young woman, and I haven't forgotten a thing. So why did we think of Mom as a mom from the very beginning? She didn't have the opportunity to pursue her dreams, and all by herself, faced everything the era dealt her, poverty and sadness, and she couldn't do anything about her very bad lot in life other than suffer through it and get beyond it and live her life to the very best of her ability, giving her body and her heart to it completely. Why did I never give a thought to Mom's dreams?”

- Chapter 2 - I'm sorry, Hyong-chol - is written by the oldest son, the firstborn of the family, the one for which mom had hoped that he will become a prosecutor.

“How can you live without trusting people? There are more people who are good than people who are bad!”

-Chapter 3 - I'm home - is written by the father, the man who was either away, or home complaining, or sick.

“You left this house whenever you wanted to, and came back at your whim, and you never once thought that your wife would be the one to leave.” 

- Chapter 4 - Another woman - is written using Mom's voice and we get a glimpse of her inner world: her dreams for herself, for her kids, we can even read about a love she had for another man's kindness. It is as if there is another woman which is totally new, totally unknown for herself, and for her family. Do our mothers stop having an inner life just because they brought us in this world? When was the last time you asked your mom about what she really wants, what she dreams about, her ambitions?

“Even though nobody knew that you were in my life, you were the person who brought a raft at every rapid current and helped me cross that water safely. I was happy that you were there. I came to tell you I was able to travel through my life because I could come to you when I was anxious, not when I was happy.”

In this chapter, we also get acquainted with the smaller daughter, the pharmacist, which had three kids, and was the one with whom mom was able to speak freely. That because she was neither hushing her nor pushing her questions aside.

-Chapter 5 - Rosewood Rosary - it is written by the oldest daughter, nine months after her mom's disappearance.

“Only after Mom went missing did you realize that her stories were piled inside you, in endless stacks. Mom's everyday life used to go on in a repeating loop, without a break. Her everyday words, which you didn't think deeply about and sometimes dismissed as useless when she was with you, awoke in your heart, creating tidal waves.”